Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Dolly Dearest (1992)

Director: Maria Lease

Starring: Denise Crosby, Sam Bottoms, Rip Torn

Run Time: 1:33

Rant: I love killer doll movies. Don't know why. Maybe I have some kinda sick fetish. I remember watching Child's Play and saying "If that doll tried to kill me I would pick it up and fuck it right in the mouth."

Right off the bat I really liked the music in the opening credits. Quickly noticed it was done by Mark Snow, the guy who did the X-Files and Millennium music. Those are probably the two best opening credits of any TV show ever.

This bastard is so boring for the first half hour but it gets pretty fun here and there. It goes from creepy parts to boring parts. The story is alright, but there isn't enough false scares and stuff like that to keep it interesting until the real shit starts going down. It's basically a drama until a doll decides to kill someone.

The acting isn't terrible besides the little girl, but you expect that from child actors. The young boy actually does an alright job, but he wears the 90est glasses I've ever seen. They're fucking dreadful. I was surprised to find it was rated R. There isn't that much blood and they say "fuck" like once.

There's one scene that should have been cut out and forgotten about forever. Towards the end a little doll stabs the dad in the leg with a pair of scissors. He pulls it out and says "Bastards." It was one of the worst things I've ever seen. It added nothing and was done very awkwardly. Other than that, this is an alright awful horror movie.

Terrible Lines: "Play with this, bitch."

Kill Count:
Camilla (33:24) Electrocuted by light bulb. Gore Rating: 2
Luis (56:10) Hand caught in sewing machine, and I think he has a heart attack. Gore Rating: 4

Horror film: 5
Entertainment: 6
Suspense: 6
Overall Rating: 5.5